S3E22: JJ Flizanes Is Striving For Balance and Exploring Addiction

JJ joins us to delve into the balance we all strive to maintain with technology and well-being.
S3E22: JJ Flizanes Is Striving For Balance and Exploring Addiction

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Show Notes

Today, JJ joins us to delve into the balance we all strive to maintain with technology and well-being. We discuss how the things we do now affect our future well-being, where proper self-care comes from, and why it is important to do the right things for the right reasons. We talk about the balance, or alignment, between self and intuition and learning to recognize your indicators for imbalance. We explore how emotions tie into our well-being, how they can physically manifest in our lives, and some of the ways JJ promotes healthy technology use. 

Technology can often become an addiction, a way for us to escape from our reality. JJ shares her approach to combating addiction in general, how to find the root of your addiction, and gives examples of how you can overcome them in a healthy way.

In this episode, you will hear:

  • Self-care should come from a place of self-love
  • Maintaining balance in all things
  • The physical manifestation of emotions and how they impact your well-being
  • Methods for healthy tech use, such as blue light glasses or filters and finding ways to stay balanced
  • Recognizing tech addiction, and ways to help you manage that
  • Disconnecting from technology to allow awareness and intuition in
  • Building mindfulness to approach issues with a calm, clear mind

JJ Flizanes is an Empowerment Strategist and hosts several podcasts including People’s Choice Awards nominee Spirit, Purpose & Energy. She is the Director of Invisible Fitness, a best-selling author of Fit 2 Love: How to Get Physically, Emotionally, and Spiritually Fit to Attract the Love of Your Life and The Invisible Fitness Formula: 5 Secrets to Release Weight and End Body Shame. Named Best Personal Trainer in Los Angeles for 2007 by Elite Traveler Magazine, JJ has been featured in many national magazines, including Shape, Fitness, and Women’s Health, and appeared on NBC, CBS, Fox, the CW, and KTLA. Grab a free copy of the Invisible Fitness Formula at http://jjflizanes.com/book

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Transcript

JJ Flizanes 0:00
From a quantum physics perspective, the frequency of a problem is different than the frequency of the solution. But when you’re in the frequency of the problem, you can’t see the solution. Because you’re literally attached to this spinning negative, your heads down. And when you disconnect, you allow space to have the idea you’re looking for come to you.

Announcer 0:21
Welcome to the healthier tech podcast, the show about building a healthier relationship with modern technology. Now, here are your hosts R blank and Stephanie Warner.

R Blank 0:34
Wow, that is quite the conversation with JJ fuzzy and stuff.

Stephanie Warner 0:39
Yeah, it was a great conversation. I really I cannot wait for our listeners to be introduced. If they have not heard of her before and her work. She has, she’s just shared some amazing insights about not only her her mission and what she she does, but also how to cut you know, the importance of building some healthy relationships with our with our tech, and in the like, overall holistic picture of your wellness, which I really love this, and I can’t wait for our listeners to hear it.

R Blank 1:09
Yeah, this is, in my opinion of all the episodes we’ve done, healthier tech, this is the most powerful. She and she has a lot to contribute here. But her her description of the benefits of establishing some boundaries with your tech, it is some of the most powerful illustration of those benefits that that we’ve had on this show. So let’s get to it. Yeah,

Stephanie Warner 1:31
absolutely.

R Blank 1:35
Today’s guest is JJ flas, aims and empowerment strategist and the host of several podcasts, including People’s Choice Awards nominee, spirit, purpose and energy. JJ started her career as a personal trainer, and was later named elite traveler Magazine’s Best personal trainer in Los Angeles in 2007. As an empowerment strategist, she now focuses on helping her podcast listeners, community and clients discover their purpose and power so they can feel good and thrive. Right now. Welcome, JJ to the healthier tech podcast.

JJ Flizanes 2:08
Well, thank you guys. I’m happy to be here.

R Blank 2:10
Oh, it’s great having you. Yeah. So just as a starting point, for the conversation, could you talk a bit about what an empowerment strategist is? And what you do?

JJ Flizanes 2:21
Sure, I think I think my my partner in crime might have rewritten that bio, which is to super cool because he didn’t give me a copy of it.

So as a personal trainer, and And before that, an actress and before that, just a curious person looking for truth as a true seeker in life about all things, you know, looking at the TV as a young person and thinking, well, if they can do that, why not? Why can’t I do that? Or going to church and thinking, Well, why don’t we do this, and you do that. So I’m just always led by curiosity and understanding and, and through learning about human behavior, and then working with the body and learning all the sciences of the body. It didn’t account for why people wanted to have a different body, why they wanted to lose weight, why they wanted to look better, or why they wanted to whatever their goals were. And again, always questioning what else is there? What more is there I learned the science of the body to apply to the body. So let’s say someone with back pain I would go through because structurally were they structurally aligned and had they seen a chiropractor and are they good to go there? Yes. Okay. Are they muscularly imbalance? Okay, yes, there. Are they nutritionally and hormonally imbalanced from the endocrine system and looking at biochemistry, okay, yes, there. There’s a certain amount that and then looking at ergonomics, okay. Do they have their ergonomics in place at their desk and how they walk and how they sit? And okay, yes, they’re so why do they sell back pain? Well, that’s another level deeper than the external that deals with the internal, which was my jam. But I didn’t know that at the time. So I’ve been a personal trainer, and I stuck with it as long as I did. And I’m still very interested in it. But it’s one factor of a multi factored person and your whole life. And there was always this feeling as a trainer, I really didn’t like the fitness industry, because the focus was on how you looked. And even though that wasn’t really ever the point of view I came from, yes, I care about how I look. Yes, I want to plan for that. But that’s not all of who I am. And who cares if it’s five pounds, 10 pounds, but who cares? If you love the way you look and love the way you feel? What’s the number it wasn’t about that for me ever? It was about longevity? It was about making sure that I know you guys taught you know with what you do you understand the whole like what I do now and what I’m exposed to now affects me 510 2050 years from now. So if I can do better now to plan for what I feel like and look like and quality of life 1015 years from now, why wouldn’t I do that? And especially as a starting out like in the personal training industry as a 20 something year old teaching people about teaching other trainers. I had an always a point of view of perspective of thinking and seeing all these people who would exercise Let’s say I don’t say incorrectly, although I would say incorrectly, but let’s say haphazardly. They are just I mean, it’s hard for me to go to the gym. Now, yesterday, we were at the gym. And I really, it’s not, I’m not trying to be a biatch. I want to, like, I want to go over to the girls with the weights and say, Can I please ask you what you think you’re doing? Like, I just want to know, what do you think you’re benefiting from? What is what muscles? Are you trying to target? What benefits and results do you expect to get from this exact thing that you’re doing? You know, I because they wouldn’t have an answer. They wouldn’t know any of that. And I can tell by the way they’re working out. So for me, I was harping on joints and joint structures and keeping your cartilage and doing things smart, do it smart, if you’re going to do it, and you’re dedicated, awesome. Now, let’s do it in a way that preserves your joints for the rest of your life, instead of wear them down so quickly that you’re gonna have joint pain, then you’re not going to want to work out, then you’re gonna go back to where you started. So to me, again, I have this, this prevention perspective, always, if I know that something is not good for me, why am I going to dance with the devil, so to speak, I’m gonna keep inviting it in why I’m not gonna make a different choice. So that’s, that’s sort of, again, from all aspects, all angles, including emotions. So back to the back pain story quickly, it’s just when you have back pain, and you do all the physical things. And what I’ve learned from my personal training career is that when you try a lot of physical things, and it’s still there, it’s not physical, it’s emotional. And, and then that just and then between that and the reason I started my show in the first place, which was to save my marriage, and taking the tools I was learning, and then learning more tools, and then bringing on guests that would help teach me and hopefully my partner who might have been listening, which wasn’t, but everybody else in my audience, right, like, I just kept bringing in more information. Because I’m a fixer, I’m a I’m a problem solver. I’m a really damn good problem solver in all kinds of areas. And so when I don’t have a tool in my toolbox to fix this thing, I go get more tools. So that’s kind of an I really collected a humongous toolbox full of things that I get to intuitively personalized for people, as well as teach them about on my show, and really come in, you know, personalized to say, this is what you may need to do whatever you want to do. And so, when I wanted to leave and like distance myself from the personal training world, again, fit to love was the book I wrote about attracting love your life, which by the way is you but, but really, it came from a place of self love and self care, and, and about self care, exercise, nutrition, fitness, meditation, vacations, whatever, all the things you do for self care, therapy, coaching, that that comes from a place of self love and respect, not from a place of the other half of the people that go to the gym or exercise. You can you can feel them thinking, God, I hate this God, I hate this God, when is this over? When is it going to be over? Right? Or, Oh, I hope this works. And somebody will love me. It’s like, that’s, to me the extremes of the of the fitness industry, you’re either you’re either in it because you care about the way you look and feel and you care about your future. Or you hate it and you feel like it’s punishment. And it’s this disconnect of it’s about only about your identity is based on your on your self worth is based on what you look like and that I’ve never been into, or like, I’m over here. So from there, that still isn’t self care is also what you think about self care is how you deal with your emotions, or learn how to process them, which most people don’t do at all very well. So and so I’ve kind of again just through time, and that’s how it got created. I was like, Okay, it’s left and right brain I am 5050 brain. And we’re all 5050 brain but I have a pretty good neurological activation on both sides of my brain. So while I’m I’m was a singer, dancer, right brain II motor, all the things. I’m also strategic. I’m also I’m really good at strategy. And I’m pretty smart. So we take all those things, put them together, I needed a right brain Ward and a left brain word. I needed a feeling component and a strategy component because they’re both needed. So that’s how I came up with empowerment strategist.

R Blank 9:07
That’s great. So yeah, and I don’t have you ever heard of the phrase utility curves? Now. So because what you were talking about reminded me of this lesson in business school, where, you know, it actually was about the example was and this is a long time ago, but you know, when you want to have a good body, why are you eating the cookie? And the that’s what brought in this visual is like right now, the utility you get out of eating the cookie, you know is high and then later on down the line, the utility goes down, and the utility of being in good shape right, that goes up right. So, so the curves are not aligned, which causes this, this dissonance in the behavior and it’s, it sounded to me like the work you do is harmonizing the utility curve. So you take more holistic kind of long term perspective on your actions and and try to align your actions with what you actually want to have happen both now and in the future.

JJ Flizanes 10:07
Yeah, and I’d say what the most important word that you said there is aligned. So I teach quantum physics and law of attraction. So there’s something about alignment and alignment of self and intuition I teach. And I have an intuition course. And part of that alignment is going to be personal versus someone else telling, right. And again, there’s that 8020 of while it may be strategic, and it might make sense, we have to take into consideration the person’s human experience. And that, that contrast or negative things or problems, so to speak, disease, whatever, these are messengers put in our path in order for us to fine tune, make different decisions, and then learn more and even grow and be better. They’re not like, Oh, I did something bad. This is Oh, this is how I’m out of balance. Oh, thank you for letting me know, I’m out of balance. Here’s my indicator to show me I need to get back into balance. And so I alignment is definitely like throughout everything that I do. And I think that that curve that you’re talking about, based on a person’s like, what’s it Where are they starting? And where do they want to go? And what’s the path that they’re going to be on unique to them. And sometimes, many times most people don’t learn things until they’re smack in their face, uncomfortable pushed up against a wall, because they didn’t want to make a decision, for whatever reason. And now all of a sudden, their results and their consequences have put them in the corner where now they’re forced to make the decision that they could have made a year ago, five years ago, 10 years ago. And now but that’s their path. That’s and that’s what most people don’t act based on prevention, they act based on pain. And I’m trying to appeal to those that have had the pain but know that they see it too. I’m like I I appeal to sort of the older souls that currently are looking and craving deeper connections and understanding things and care about their body and care about their money and care about all the surface things that you know, in this human experience, but really have a much broader perspective. So

R Blank 11:54
no, go go for?

Stephanie Warner 11:55
Well, I’m intrigued by the concept of emotional back pain. And I kind of wanted to go back a little bit and talk about that for a second and ask you, if you might eat when you’ve identified an emotional pain like that. Could you talk a little bit about what you what you do, like what you would how you would guide someone to to deal with that type of emotional or physical ailment based on an emotional cause?

JJ Flizanes 12:22
Sure. Well, how I like to just even out the playing field of the listeners right now and anyone new to this concept. Just think about what happens when what happens to you, personally, when you get embarrassed. What physical thing happens when you get embarrassed, you’re flush it flush down, right? How about when you’re nervous? What happens when you’re nervous, tight, tight muscles, butterflies in the stomach, right? Okay, these are physical manifestations of an emotion. So on that very top surface level. Now imagine that you have deep seated resentment, rage, anger, clenching. Yeah, hold on to that long enough that becomes cancer or back pain, right each area of the body and it lines up with chakra energy lines up with organ energy right so your heart chakra, I deal with a lot of cancer patients who literally have had like multiple cancers in the same area and they have never looked at the emotions underneath the hood for that, you know, so when back pain generally based on the work of Dr. John Sarno, he wrote healing back pain, he wrote the mind body prescription and he has maybe one other book after that, but he’s no longer with us, but to Dr. John Sarno, who’s not woowoo at all that man, if you’re watching on video, boring as hell, oh my god so straight, like, deadpan. I was thinking he’d be more energetic, not not at all. But he is book healing back pain. By reading it alone, I have had people reduced by 50% or more their back pain is from reading the book. Wow. So back pain generally is usually repressed rage. And when we think about where and in Chinese medicine, the liver is where you hold anger and the livers and the lower Jow where the lower back is, right. So we can look at different modalities and methodologies of education to layer and sort of make decisions. So case by case is going to be different. But yes, there are sections of the body in fact, I have this really great book called messages from the body and it literally is like 70 100 pages and it goes through every finger every joint every tooth every in terms of its emotional root of what

Stephanie Warner 14:25
started really excellent one on me. That’s amazing.

JJ Flizanes 14:29
Yeah, so it’s going to be personalized, like what’s right for somebody, you know, obviously, it’s it’s subconscious rage and the lower back so someone’s not necessarily gonna know what it is because that’s why it’s subconscious. Right? But tapping into that and finding a healthy way to express and I have I’m gonna have tons of courses and the work that we do to do that and to find where that is. It may not be one session or two sessions, especially when it’s about a practice of releasing things we’re holding on to, but generally speaking, yeah, I’ve I’ve got tons of different ways to assess and and connect what It is and then what to do about it? It’s based on all kinds of personalized things, right? In terms of what you’re willing to do, what’s the most you know, what you’ve done and what you’ve tried and hasn’t worked? What you know, looking at that,

Stephanie Warner 15:12
thank you for answering that. Yeah, I’m

R Blank 15:13
trying to figure out in my head picture, what a session with you actually, like, looks like, like, is it you? And a client or a patient? Like sitting on a couch and talking through things? Or is it like you’re in a gym? And you know, like, how do you work with like, actually work with people?

JJ Flizanes 15:32
So to be honest, I only usually promote I mean, I’m obviously on your podcast right now. We’re talking about it. But I only really work with people who listen to my show. And part of that is because I don’t have to do this. Here’s what I do. Not Not that I’m gonna answer this question. I mean, in terms of like, if someone was to come to me and say, hey, I want to work with you, most of the time, they’re coming, because I already know like, and trust me, that’s what the podcast does. And they already know what kinds of topics I cover, they understand my point of view. And they again, know like, and trust me, so by the time they get to me, they’re ready to like, go, or just what I prefer, because otherwise, I don’t have to explain, here’s what I do.

Stephanie Warner 16:07
Yeah, no, that’s great, right, great strategy. That’s, it just

JJ Flizanes 16:11
cuts the fat of like, I’m not out there to sell one of them. I have my live event coming up in October, and every year at my live event is when I fill my like your long programs or my six month programs, but when people come what I love about my events, compared to like other people’s conferences, if you will, is invite all these people to come. And then nobody knows who anybody is, except the person whose conferences, and there’s a lot of time spent in selling you on who I am, why you should trust me what I’ve accomplished. Here’s my right, it’s like, Oh, my God, just listen, my damn show. I love when people show up, and they’re ready to get to work. Like we like roll up the sleeves, and we’re getting in there and we’re doing the work that you can’t do by listening to a podcast, the work you can’t do by reading a book, the work you can’t even do by seeing a therapist or a coach one on one. It’s like a whole nother level. But we get in there and we go deep, fast. And we like work on stuff people transform in a weekend. And that’s what I love to do. So if someone was coming to me for sessions, first of all, I don’t do one I do too. So my first starter pack is a two session starter pack. And the reason it’s two is because I used to do these elaborate like, again from Mind, Body Soul, blah, blah, blah, the whole thing nutrition exercise. Like I would overload somebody in one session with my I wouldn’t give them everything the kitchen sink, here’s all the things I think you should do. And then of course, what would happen, they don’t do any of it. Why? Cuz I overload you with too much stuff. So we start with to a to see if this is gonna work for you. And this is a fit. And then you come and tell me what you want. Some kind of homework happens, and maybe listen, a couple shows, I use my podcast as an archive of teachings. So I don’t have to repeat myself 20 million times. I said, Go listen to this before you come back and do these things. And sometimes our exercises I have a core wound exercise, which gets to it core wound exercise can take away five years of therapy, if your therapist doesn’t take you down the right path, because it’s like you’re talking about the same story over and over again. And you can come out of therapy after years not even being able to identify what your core wounds are, what emotional triggers happen after that, and how do you respond every time I can give you that in an hour. Now, that doesn’t mean you’re going to be over it, it just identifies the pattern. So again, it depends on what somebody wants coming in. And I would say the people that usually work with me know that they I’d say really, they want to be happier in every way they want to save a relationship, they want to heal the disease that they’re dealing with, they want to find a life purpose because they’re in their 50s or 60s. And they’re tired of giving to their family and their kids and their wife and their husband and whoever. And it’s now their turn, they want to know how to create internal happiness that doesn’t rely on anybody else. And that’s usually why people are attracted to me.

R Blank 18:51
So what I’m getting is a picture of a very holistic approach to to health, not just mental health and physical health, but just you know, your short term goals, long term goals, vision of self. And of course, as you know, you’re on the healthier tech podcast. And so with that perspective, which I feel actually this is this is a really cool opportunity to speak to because there’s not a whole lot of people with that brought up a set of perspectives on these issues. What types of effects are you seeing, because tech is so important to people’s lives these days? What type of impacts are you seeing whether they be physical like, as you mentioned back pain? I know back pain can be a huge issue for some people who use their just, as a basic example use their computers and with a bad posture, but what types of effects are you seeing amongst your clientele, from their relationships with technology? And I know that’s not a simple question, but walk me through some of that.

JJ Flizanes 19:53
So years ago, probably was 2000. I launched my show in 2014. So I’m gonna say 2015 is when I had Dr. Elizabeth With Plourde on and she did a whole show on EMFs. So it’s been a while. So not everybody has heard that show because it only lives on Fit to love it doesn’t live on, might not live on any other channel. And I’ve got four more shows that go out every week. Alongside that, so knowing that some people heard that and maybe made choices based on that, but it’s been a while. So it’s a good refresher to to look at, you know, what are we doing to protect ourselves from electromagnetic frequencies and their disruption of our energetic fields, our intuition, our body’s ability to heal our parasympathetic state of being, which is where we heal ourselves, and not too many people understand? I mean, they do. But I would say where I’m seeing that effect is, for me, it’s about addiction. What do we do that keeps us out of balance. And technology, while it’s necessary can be an addiction, because even last night with one of my clients I’ve had literally, before I started my show, she was a local personal training client turned like, she’s just been with me since 2009. She even admitted we did her core wound work last night. And she admitted that she said, sometimes I’ll take all the shifts at work in order to avoid putting myself out there, because she wants to make connections and find a partner. And, and it’s so people do that with technology. They don’t. And I am guilty of it, too. I’m guilty of it. I don’t have a smartphone, which at first I had, nope, I have a flip phone. And I don’t have it on me. But I have a flip phone. In fact, as I’m cleaning my office, I have like all of my flip phones and like I need to pull them out of the boxes, line them up and take a picture of all my flip phones. Because I still use a flip phone. But I use an iPad, and I live on this thing. I live on it. And it’s not good. But so how I create balance for myself is to you know, like I had a VIP day with one of my clients yesterday, and we did it outside. So I sat outside and I tried to ground. You know, I obviously teach grounding. I work with an earthing company. I’ve got earthing products and affiliate of earthing products. And so having like sitting on a mat, which I took mine off, because it was all crinkled up or having a floor mat, you know how to balance out like looking at, okay, if you have to be with a certain amount of tech for a certain amount of time. And unfortunately, maybe it’s an out of balance amount of time that the if you’re not willing to change or you don’t think you can, what can we do to support that? What kind of products can we add to help to damp in the amount of exposure? You know, I do have? I do have the glasses, but they don’t look so good. Like, you know, from the blue light from the screens? I’m wearing them right now. Are you oh my gosh, well, they’re clear. Yeah, mine aren’t clear minor yellow, the blue blockers, I’m trying to find them. Because they’re fun to watch, especially with you guys. I should have brought them out. But I have blue blockers. I’ve had two versions of them. But I don’t wear glasses. So I don’t I feel like I’m not going to record in these anyway, they’re here somewhere. Obviously, I don’t use them very much. I don’t know where they are. But so things like blue blockers, things like mats and pads and cell phone protectors. And you know, that’s part of it. But the other part is the relationship to the device a relationship to your work. I said to her last night, you do realize that’s workaholism. That’s the addiction where you’re out of balance because you’re, you’re afraid. So what’s underneath this is you’re afraid so you’re you’re rationalizing, I’m going to work more I’m going to make more money, which is good, but it doesn’t get you what you want, which is personal connection with new people. So So I look at that attack from the from life balance, and then the health effects or not or bad effects, right from what they’re exposed to. And then try to balance that by I mean, Doug and I moved last year, we have half of an acre backyard and a pool, we try to be outside as much as possible. We exercise outside three days a week. You know, we don’t sleep with our phones in the room. Although with that said, we do listen to something and it does. It’s through a phone, but the Wi Fi and the Bluetooth is shut off like it’s as best as I can get it because I because there are binaural beats and I want to listen to them. And I do need some kind of tech to do it. Because I have to be in your ears. It can’t just be on a speaker. But so it’s trying to balance the exposure. There’s no nothing on in the room that is active and can ring. But the battery’s still there, right. So that’s that’s how I look at it when dealing with clients. And because I want them I recognize like what you said it’s necessary. Absolutely. And but it becomes out of balance, and it becomes dangerous. And sometimes we have to start planning for how can we, again, balance that out?

R Blank 24:29
So the question of balance, I think is really key. And I appreciate your discussion on on how you approach that for yourself. How do you like I mean, I guess if someone’s already working with you, they know they want to change something and so maybe they’re more willing to to modify their behaviors to attack that relationship with tech. But how do you actually work with a client to get them, you know, over over that hump, to get them to actually make it back and with tech and protect Killer, because you mentioned addiction. And that. That is I mean, that’s a serious issue. And it’s, it’s a real issue when it comes, especially with phones, but not just with phones. And so when even if someone wants to make a change, you know, that’s not, it’s not necessarily so easy. And so how is it that you find success with that particular set of challenges?

JJ Flizanes 25:22
So how I handle addiction in general is that it’s two part, it’s never about the thing, right? So it’s not the alcohol didn’t make you an addict. You’re trying to numb something, right? It’s not the coke. It’s really once it’s not tobacco, once 72 hours is passed, tobacco is out of your system. It has nothing to do someone’s like, oh, addicted to smoking. Yeah, no, that tobacco is out of your system and 72 hours. So you’re no longer it’s not about the substance, changing your chemistry in your brain. It’s about you repressing emotion, period, end of story. That’s all what addiction is. I can’t sit still and just be because God forbid, I’ll feel something that’s uncomfortable. And then I won’t know what to do with. And I’m afraid of that. Because it could take me down a hole I can’t get out of so not even go there. Let’s just numb it. So we have to take it from two angles of it’s not about the thing. Right? And but there is a habit that’s in place. That’s why people it’s funny, because people say oh, it’s a it’s a with smoking, it’s a oral fixation. Yeah, Bs, it’s total BS, because so it’s called your fidgety and nervous. And you will repress with this. And now this isn’t here, you’re pressing with something else. But it could be switching from smoking, to being addicted to your phone, or to control issues. It’s not a BS on that one. Okay, it’s about the emotions. If you don’t look underneath the hood, that’s the problem. So there’s two parts of this one would be to you have a certain habit that takes up a certain amount of time in your day. And it’s something you’re so ingrained, you’re neurologically programmed for it, we can’t just deny that that’s there. If we’re going to wean you off of this habit, we do need some kind of replacement. So it’s not about not doing it, it’s about what are you doing instead. So in the case of sitting in front of your computer, if I’m sitting in my computer, you know, and Doug does this beautifully now. I mean, he has since moving to California, anyway, he did it in in DC, it’s like, oh, I have to go outside, he used to always I got to go outside and in DC is because you know, it’s not summer and sunny and nice all the time versus in California. And like It’s like this all the time, you can calm down you can. But now it’s about the disconnect of I want to get away from my computer, and I want to get away from work and I’m gonna go in the garage or work on my car, I’m gonna go take a walk outside, I’m gonna go in the pool, I’m gonna go trim the bushes, I’m gonna go work on the roses, whatever. So going outside and resetting. You know, animals do it all the time when there’s they reset their bodies, that’s why they stretch and do certain things when they get up from a position. So I would say, balancing that out and having a break. And there are plenty of methods that people have out there for doing that. There’s like little devices, you can get that like Buzz and make you get up like, I don’t want to wear a device like that. Just because to me I’ve been annoyed at some point. But or having an alarm or like, I would like to gamify it like if you you know, you go outside you log how much time and then you start to make it like oh, look at me, I’m I spent 30 minutes today outside because I took 10 minutes in between each, each interview and I went outside. So we do need to slowly reprogram and rien make a new neural pathway for another option you can replace that behavior with, but then I’m always gonna want to look under the hood and say, What do you hide from? What do you run from? What do you numb and from, because without that, you’re just going to keep replacing it. So that’s what that’s what I mean, it’s not about the thing. It’s about what you’re not willing to sit in, we’re never going to really change it until we look at what you’re trying to run away from. But But, but some people aren’t ready for that. So let’s just start replacing it easily and see if your nervous system calms down a little bit. And then if they Okay, cool, and then we can get a little bit deeper and see, you know, again, what the problem is that you’re trying to Nam.

R Blank 28:56
Do you what what types of what types of benefits are your because even if someone’s comes to you with with a with a strong desire for self improvement to align their goals with their actions, they might not necessarily see maybe the same damage that they’re experiencing from their relationship with their phone that you see from them. What types of benefits or improvements, you know, just a few examples are you seeing or do your clients realize once they start making those those changes?

JJ Flizanes 29:28
So you know, I talk a lot about anxiety on the show people think anxiety is like a disease or a problem like oh, I have anxiety. I’m like, oh, okay, you know what anxiety is? It’s a body sensation, it means you’re holding on to an emotion that needs to be released or processed. And the more you have, the more you’re trying to hold it down, which is what this anxiety is it’s holding it down right? So people who can have an outlet for that whether it be exercise going outside disconnecting, that starts to come down a little bit and then what happens is people sleep better. They find that their stomach their digestion improves because As they’re not always nervous all the time, right there. So I see things change in their life. And for some people, it’s they finally get a good night’s sleep, which helps to help with the disease, right? It helps their blood work, it helps. It helps them focus better. They’re not, they’re not full of encouragement. And sometimes they get clarity on something that they’ve been stuck in, you know, from a, from a quantum physics perspective, the frequency of a problem is different than the frequency of the solution. But when you’re in the frequency of the problem, you can’t see the solution. Because you’re literally attached to this spinning, negative, you know, your heads down. And when you disconnect, you allow space to have the idea you’re looking for come to you, it happens to me every time I exercise every time. So she alone, doing cardio, I will get some great idea and answer some question. And like light bulbs happen all the time, because I’m outside, I’m with the Earth, I’ve got music on my bodies moving, everything’s moving in this channel opens up. So I think, you know, when we disconnect from our technology, we allow in our intuition, we allow in awareness consciousness, like what’s going on with me when someone’s focused, especially this is no disrespect, like men are single focus. So when a man is literally focused on whatever we focus on, he’s he’s denying everything else. That’s why sometimes men die faster, right? Because like, you have all the symptoms of heart attack coming, but you ignore them all because you’re trying to cut the deer and all sudden, boom, dead. Right? But did you see it coming? Well, but that’s just you’re built to you know, you’re built to focus on one thing, but when we stop in like art, or in our bodies, and go, Hey, I have this like weird pain here. Like, what’s that about? Like how, when we catch it early, we can do something about it. So I see lives change by coming more into the body by coming more into in the moment, and not being like, and this addicted adrenaline rush of had made more money, I have to do this business, I have to get this thing I have to finish this. It’s all this fight or flight, right. That’s what we get into with technology, we are asked to think and process at a speed. That’s not humanly possible. And so we tax our adrenals. We tax our hormones, in ways we are not designed to do so by taking a step away from technology or having balance, streamlining, be more efficient, adding balance, adding the things that you can to make it a healthier experience, will help to again help you sleep better weight loss happens, happiness happens, clarity, clarity happens, less you feel less stress, your anxiety comes down, you get more excited, you have a clearer mind. So I think I’ve seen all of that happen.

Stephanie Warner 32:38
Sorry that that’s a really great it’s actually been a reoccurring theme in in some of our interviews lately, have just stopped slowing down and creating the space for clarity and intuition. Intuition has been a definitely a reoccurring theme. And I think there’s a lot of truth in that. And it’s, it’s I’m hoping that our listeners definitely take a take that nugget of like just slowing down and disconnecting. And especially if you’re feeling stuck, or you’re not feeling well, what’s your body telling you stop and listen?

JJ Flizanes 33:14
Alright, did you have something you want? Oh, sorry.

Stephanie Warner 33:16
I think he’s waiting for me ask a question. I’m like, No, I’m just making us Yeah, okay. No, that

R Blank 33:21
was that was the I have to say, and this is down, we’re good way into the third season. And that was by far the most detailed description of the benefits of disconnecting or maybe just rationalizing your relationship with technology. And I guess it shouldn’t be a surprise given how holistic your approach is to health and personal improvement. But that was that was a real I really appreciated that. That you walking us through that. That was a really great picture that you painted. Thank you. So So you mentioned earlier that you have an event coming up in October The Awaken your dream life event. Can you share a bit about that? And maybe how people who are interested can learn more?

JJ Flizanes 34:05
Sure, well, first, I can tell you, if you’re at all interested in this conversation, and we Jive we vibe, you haven’t been getting gotten pissed off yet. Or because it happens. And that’s okay. That’s okay. I’m not for everybody. If you are someone who wants change, and you’re serious about taking action, and you believe in yourself and you invest in yourself, then I’m your girl. If you’re someone who is going to tiptoe and get offended all the time, I’m not your girl. So awaken your dream life is a three day event in October 14 to the 16th in Redondo Beach, California. And again, I really would love anyone who’s interested please listen the podcast first like really kind of listen to a couple episodes make sure we’re in alignment because when you get there you will be asked to grow. You will be asked to go outside of your comfort zone pretty much the entire time. But But that’s where change happens is when you want something more than your you As to in order to do that you gotta go somewhere you haven’t been before. So we have to stretch and it’s theirs. We’re just going to be working on activating and embodying the four different quadrants. Some of the work I’m gonna be doing is based on the work of Jill Bolte Taylor. She’s a neurosurgeon and nurse and a neuroanatomist. I’m sorry, she’s not a surgeon. She’s a neuroanatomist. And she wrote the book, the first book was my Stroke of Insight, she had a stroke. And she wrote eight years took to come out of that. But she wrote the book about having her left brain offline and living in her right brain. And she was so excited, actually, while she was having her stroke, like, cool, I’m gonna get to learn what this is like from the inside. And then she can’t coming out of that she wrote another book called whole brain living. And she divides the brain into four parts not to, and and so from those four parts, those four characters, those four choices, those four neural pathways, you know, we don’t all live in a full brain. And most of us have a dominant neurological circuitry patterned already set up, based on our parents based on the way we were told to live based on a lot of things. And there are so many, but we can’t have different experiences in life, and we can’t get to whatever we think is our dream life without activating the other parts, but they may be new to you. And you may not know how, and even if you know how it may scare the crap out of you. So this is a place to come and literally, like create new neural pathways into different parts of your brain and allow yourself to expand and grow and be different. And embody that thing. You want that person you want to be that life you want to have. And there’s really no other way around it. You can’t think about it, and you can’t talk about it, you have to do it. So at my events, we do it, we do things, we don’t just talk about things. It’s not like it’s MIMO mostly, there’s not like a bunch of speakers. It’s just me, and you and a group, and we do exercises, and we have a good time. And people laugh, people cry, and people’s lives change. And that’s what happens.

R Blank 36:53
That sounds power. Yeah, I’ve no, I’ve no, yeah, I have no problem believing that it’s, that’s a pretty active event. Given my, my exposure with you today. So you’d mentioned your podcast listeners can find those all of them at JJ floodplains.com. And the links there will be in the show notes. Are there other places you’d like our listeners to kind of connect with you or link up?

JJ Flizanes 37:16
Let’s see. So I have a free workshop that I did, if anyone’s interested, it’s called the three reasons why talk therapy is effective. And if that’s something that might interest people. So that’s JJ info xanes.com, forward slash therapy. And it goes over the reason why, again, the kind of work that I’m doing in coaching, and even have a coaching certification, where I’m training other people to do what I’m doing. It’s sort of like my perspective, and why over the years, even as you know, not a therapist, but and I would be challenged on this all the time with my last relationship, are you to say you don’t have the degree to and and I write, and I knew he was doing that, though, because? Because I was right. So. So the problem is that when you actually when someone because otherwise I was brilliant, right with everybody else, oh, as long as it was everybody else spot on spot on with me? No, you don’t know what you’re talking about. But what I’ve noticed over the years, coming out of the out of this personal training industry into the coaching industry, and like standing on stage and be like, Hey, here’s what I do. Now, I will have the same, not the same again, listeners of my show, not the average person who doesn’t know me, but someone who listened my show for a while, have a couple sessions and be like I got more out of two sessions with you than I did six years in therapy. It happens all the time. And and I end there, but there are reasons or constructs about why talk therapy is literally built to keep you in your story, which doesn’t make you change. So anyway. So it doesn’t mean hey, there are some great ones out there. Power to if you’re having a great time and you’re getting what you need and your life is changing. That’s the key word, your life is changing your life, life looks different. If you don’t respond the same, you’re on the same path. But if you just keep avoiding other people, but you still have the same triggers and respond the same way it ain’t working. So it’s three reasons why talk therapy is ineffective JHF xanes.com forward slash therapy, it’s a free workshop. And you can least give you some structured go, Oh, and there’s a tool in there too. There’s a tool that you can use that I teach you. It’s called the feelings and needs list. And this is an invaluable tool that if you do nothing else, if you just master this, your life will improve at least by 50%. I promise and your emotions. This tool is very important. So you can get that in that workshop.

R Blank 39:26
Excellent. Thank you. Yeah. So again, that’s JJ Fl designs.com. And we’ll have the links in the show notes. JJ, thank you so much. This has been this has been an amazing conversation. I really appreciate you taking the time to come join us on the healthier tech podcast.

JJ Flizanes 39:41
Thank you so much. Thank you, Arne. Stephanie, it was a pleasure having you thank you for your great questions. And for the work that you’re doing in the world also, because we need to we can’t run away from technology and we really need to get a handle on our relationship and responsibility to what it does to us and to the world. So thank you for what you’re doing to you.

R Blank 39:58
Thank you And

Announcer 40:01
thank you so much for listening to this episode of the healthier tech podcast. Remember to check the show notes for all the links and resources mentioned in the show. Please like and subscribe to the healthier tech podcast on Apple, Spotify or your podcast platform of choice. Get your free quickstart guide to building a healthy relationship with technology and our latest information at healthier tech.co

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

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R Blank

R Blank

R Blank is the founder of Healthier Tech and the host of “The Healthier Tech Podcast”, available iTunes, Spotify and all major podcasting platforms.

R has a long background in technology. Previously, R ran a software engineering firm in Los Angeles, producing enterprise-level solutions for blue chip clients including Medtronic, Apple, NBC, Toyota, Disney, Microsoft, the NFL, Ford, IKEA and Mattel.

In the past, he served on the faculty at the University of Southern California Viterbi School of Engineering where he taught software engineering, as well as the University of California, Santa Cruz.

He has spoken at technology conferences around the world, including in the US, Canada, New Zealand and the Netherlands, and he is the co-author of “AdvancED Flex Development” from Apress.

He has an MBA from the UCLA Anderson School of Management and received his bachelor’s degree, with honors, from Columbia University. He has also studied at Cambridge University in the UK; the University of Salamanca in Spain; and the Institute of Foreign Languages in Nizhny Novgorod, Russia.

Connect with R on LinkedIn.

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